Sakura (The Legend of the Cherry Blossom)

Thursday, May 31, 2012



 

Akihiro sat underneath the apricot tree, enjoying all of the beauty and smells of spring time. It was a bright evening. The moon was hovering in the starless night sky, and its beams were passing through the gaps of the flowers of the apricots, washing everything in an enthralling and magical glow. Paper lanterns were hung on the branches of the trees to add elucidation to the ground of the Daigoji Temple.
Watching and marvelling the beauty of the flowers of the apricots was Akihiro’s favourite way of letting the time pass as inevitable as the flow of the water of the river to the sea. They never failed in making him caught his breath with awe and pleasure. He stood up and ran his fingers all over his kimono to tidy his appearance again. He closed his eyes and breathe in, loving the serene feeling he devours every time he was standing under the canopy of the apricot trees. He opened his eyes and released a fulfilling sigh.
Nothing could ever surpass the beauty of the apricots, he thought.
The newly blossomed apricots were swaying as the crisp wind of February blew in whirls. They were like long drapes hung over an open window. As the petals cascaded through the wind from the dancing trees, Akihiro reached his hand, palm up, and caught a single petal. It was the colour of the sky when the sun kisses the sea during sunset.
“Aren’t they just breathtakingly beautiful?” a voice of a lady behind Akihiro said and he almost jump in surprise for he did not notice somebody came behind him.
He turned to his back and held his breath as he stared of such beauty that instantaneously held his heart captive. Standing in front of him was a lady around his age. She got deep brown eyes, and as he stared at them, he feels like being lured. He felt like the world had seemed stopped running around him. Her lips were as rosy pink as her cheeks, like they were still in the grasps of the winter chill. Akihiro wanted more than anything to touch and caress them. She was wearing a kimono a pale hue of crimson. Her hair billowed with the wind, and Akihiro thought for a moment he might like to run his fingers in delight over her hair. She looked at him, and for a moment, he felt like his heart was going to jump out of his chest as she smiled at him a bewitching smile. Ethereal. He finally found something that surpassed the beauty of the apricots, only she wasn’t a thing.
“May I have the pleasure of knowing your name, my dear lady?” he said, and curtsied.
“Sakura.” She said, and handed him a beautiful pink flower. “My name is Sakura.”
Akihiro stared at the beautiful and velvety pink flower that was rested in the palm of his hand. Its petals were elliptical and as pink as her cheeks and lips. Never did he ever see that flower before. A flower that, like Sakura, was far more beautiful than the apricot’s. He looked up. His mouth gaped as he realized that Sakura was gone. He let his gaze travel around him, to the trees and to the bushes, but she was nowhere in sight.
Sakura. He kept on thinking about her as he lied that night to sleep. Sakura, he kept on muttering under his breath, loving the feeling of her name on his lips although it made nothing to fill the huge gaping hole of longing he felt for her in his heart. That was a night full of thoughts about her, and Akihiro was oblivious that the sleep was lurking around until it claimed him.
The next days after the night of their meeting, Akihiro had searched for Sakura. He’d gone back into the temple and onto the ground that was packed with people. But she’s nowhere to find. He had searched everywhere, high and low, but it seemed Sakura was refusing to reappear again. He’s hopeless, searching for a lady he barely knew. He almost give up until one day, he finally found her.
Akihiro was getting into a caving stone archway that led to the ground of the temple. In the distance, he could see the people were gathering on the grounds. Others were already settled underneath the apricot trees, eating and drinking, and children were running and playing. The apricots were in full bloom now, and its flowers were like flames decorated all over the tree. Despite the distress he was feeling, his lips curved into a weak and tired smile. But that smile was ephemeral, for it turned into a hopeful smile as his gaze darted into a single pink flower that lied peacefully on the grass. It was the same flower that Sakura had given him the night they met.
“She is here,” he said in a whisper, picking the flower from the embrace of the grass. He went half-running to the ground, unable to suppress his excitement of the thought that he had a chance of seeing Sakura again.
Akihiro found her sitting on the edge of the fountain, running her fingers in its water and humming a very enchanting lullaby.  She was staring at a tree that I’d never seen grow; bear fruits or leaves or flowers before. It was the only unattractive and distracting thing among all of the beauty there was in the temple’s ground.
“Isn’t it very distracting?” Akihiro said the moment he was standing beside her. Sakura didn’t even flinch or cringe in surprise. But instead, she gave him a puzzled look when she looked at him. “I mean the tree. It’s out of place here in this beautiful ground. How unfortunate. It should be cut down and make firewood.”
Sakura shook her head before turning to look at the tree. Then she stood up beside Akihiro.
“It’s beautiful. Just because it doesn’t have leaves and flowers and fruits doesn’t mean it’s unsightly.  We must look inside and deeper because sometimes, what we see with our eyes is deceiving. Some beauties are hidden. Just like this tree.” She said. She slowly walked towards the tree and Akihiro followed behind her. She stopped a few feet away from the tree’s trunk. She reached up her hand and pressed her palm on the trunk, and then closed her eyes. “Feel it.”
Akihiro did the same. He pressed his palm just beside Sakura’s, and reluctantly closed his eyes, feeling foolish. Akihiro was stunned, for he felt like the tree was shuddering by his palm. It seemed like it had its own heart and was pulsating and beating. They took their hands away, which left Akihiro in a bewildering moment.
“Did you feel it, Akihiro?” Sakura asked, smiling at him. Her hair was ornamented with those beautiful pink flowers. He reproduced the one he got from the grass and tucked it back on her hair, where it truly belonged.
“Yes. It was shuddering however that happened. Or maybe it was just my imagination.” He replied, shrugging his shoulders.
“Maybe,” she said and started walking off.
“Sakura, how did you know my name?”
“The people said you have searched for me. Have you?”
“Yes. I mean…uh … It’s just that…” he stammered.
He stopped struggling to find some words to say when Sakura held his hand, and entwined her fingers with his. “Then I will stay and never leave you again.”
That was the spring time when their love started growing in their hearts. Akihiro never dreamed that the day would come he’ll find a lady that would capture his heart. All of those days that he was just chasing down a daydream; all of those days that he was living in a blur have come to an end. For there came Sakura who made his life clearer than a crystal.
Summer time came, and the two became inseparable. The love they felt for each other had bloomed, emanating a fragrant that nothing could ever be compared. Autumn came, when the flowers were starting to wilt and leaves were starting to fell off from their branches, yet their love had never wilted nor fell off from their hearts. It was still entrenched in there, irremovable, for forever.
But when the snow of the winter had just started to fall, Sakura was tainted with a terrible sickness. She was constantly visited by a high fever, and sometimes she was retching blood if not through her nose. Akihiro was very anxious, for he didn’t know what to do. His heart was being tortured and tormented every time he heard Sakura groan in pain. He dreamed that if only he could take away her pain, he would ache herself just for her. But he can not. And he didn’t know what to do about her. He was sorrowful every time he played in his mind what Sakura had said to him one night that she’s destined to die on the time of the winter solstice. He knew she could be strange some times. But he chose not to believe her. He cannot lose her.
“I’m leaving,” Sakura said in a weak and tired voice.
“No. you are not leaving. You’re too weak to go out.” Akihiro said, squeezing her cold hands. He dried the perspiration that was forming on her forehead with a cloth, and then threw the blanket to keep her warm.
The snow was still falling lightly outside. The chill of the winter was grasping Akihiro’s heart, turning it into an ice, and he didn’t know what to do to give it warm again.
“It’s winter solstice. I’ll leave now,” Sakura rested her head on Akihiro’s chest, loving his smell and the warmth he was emanating.
Akihiro threw his arms around her and released a heavy sigh as he realized what she really meant about her leaving. “I thought you are staying with me forever.”  Akihiro struggled not to cry, but the tears were starting to form, stinging his eyes. “I thought you will never going to leave me.”
“Don’t worry. I will come back for you.” She looked on his face, and dried the tears that were now flowing to his cheeks with her fingers. “I will.”
“When?” he asked between sobs, although he knew she wasn’t coming back ever again once she’s gone.
“On spring. And every spring since. I will ”
Akihiro didn’t really understand what she was saying, but he agreed anyway, not wanting to wear her out. He hummed the lullaby she taught him until she fell asleep. She fell asleep in his arms. And she knew that she will never wake up forever. The winter chill that was grasping his grief-stricken heart thawed and its water flowed out through his eyes into something that he knew would never end cascading.
He never knew why, but when spring came, he waited for her, convincing himself that she’s coming back. He knew that she was gone, but a tiny flame of hope was still flickering inside his heart. Everyday he was dreaming of having her again; caressing her rosy pink cheeks and kissing her little soft lips.
It was blooming season again, and this time, the apricots failed in making him happy. He wandered as lonely as a wind all over the ground of the temple, until he came into the flowerless, fruitless and leafless tree that Sakura had admired for a reason that was too bewildering for him to understand. The memories of them had come ringing through the air, and Akihiro sat down, and leaned his back on the tree’s trunk. He gazed around him, feeling like he was reunited with Sakura again. He could hear in the breeze the lullaby that Sakura loved to hum. Akihiro found himself smiling again since a long time that he wasn’t as he hummed along with the breeze, closing his eyes, hoping Sakura would appear when he opened them again.
When he opened his eyes, his mouth gaped in awe. Right before his eyes, a magical moment was happening. The beautiful pink flowers of Sakura were emerging one after another on the branches of the tree; from velvety buds until they dramatically open, revealing their surrealistic beauty. She had lived with her promise, and Akihiro can’t help himself not to smile. He stood up and kept his gaze onto the beautiful flowers above him. Then he reached his hand and pressed his palm on the trunk of the tree. Now, he will never be bewildered again. But he would believe that the tree was pulsating and beating Sakura’s heart.
The fruitless, leafless and flowerless tree was now the most beautiful thing in his eyes.
“Aishiteru, Sakura.”



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Without You 8

Wednesday, May 23, 2012




I am so sorry po talaga kung hindi ako nakapagupdate for MONTHS! kasi I was so busy cause I just graduated with a BSN degree!! yehey for me!! oh well Im back and marami pang twist ang kwento kong to... at ang lahat nang ito ay para sa inyo kasi mahal ko ang followers ko!

Bati portion na, Thanks to Miss D. and sir Jayson P., sori po talaga kung hindi ako nakapagupdate :(, Jayfpina na parating nakaabang sa site ko, kina Russ, Rue, joseph, joed12, ramy from qatar, na walang sawang nagpapa-abot nang kagalakan sa kwento ko, andrei, dark_ken, Ross, Coffee Prince, Calle 'aso, Chris, Zirjay S. at sa mga anons at sa mga nag e-mail, type ko pa ulit yung scene na yun... soon you will be updated... thank you talaga mula sa kaibuturan nang puso ko.

Website: urikido.blogspot.com
Email: uri_kido10@yahoo.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/urikido10
8th Installment na and last nang first part at heto na ang theme song nito nasa video link sa baba :) and don't mind to leave a comment, i would highly appreciate it even if you do go Anon :)

is it truely a happy ending for Caleb and Enzo or will there be a new Name on the story board?



CHAPTER 8: The Sunrise

“Kaya mo ba?” tanong niya sa akin.

“Gusto ko toh, kaya kakayanin ko toh” sabi ko naman.

“Si Andrew yang kalaban mo, kaibigan natin siya baka magkasakitan lang kayo” pagpupumilit niya sa akin habang gumagawa ako nang campaign parafernalias sa boarding house nila. Samantalang siya ay nag eempake nang gamit.

Malapit na nun ang araw nang election sa campus, at marami na akong ginagawa para sa pagtakbo ko nang president nang student body, medyo nagiging busy pero heto pinupuno parin ang pagiging nobyo ni Enzo, parati na nga akong doon sa kanila.

“Di ka na ba magpapapigil diyan sa balak mo?” tanong ni Enzo sa akin.

“Ikaw nga din a mapipigilan ang pag lipat mo kina Mark…” sabi ko nang hindi siya tinitignan. Nang bigla niya akong niyakap mula sa likod.

“Mahal na mahal kita baby ko” sabay halik mula sa batok ko papunta sa likod nang tenga. Mainit ang sensasyong dumaloy sa kalamnan ko noon. Hindi maipaliwanag na kiliti at kuryente na dumadaloy sa katawan, hanggang maabot niya ang aking pisngi, alam ko na ang balak niyang abutin, ang mga labi ko. Pero pinigilan ko na siya sa balak niya, hindi aprin ako nagpapahalik sa kanya kahit kelan.

“Mahal na Mahal din naman kita Dady ko, at aalis na ako kailangan ko pang puntahan si Mr. Reyes sa school, mag-ingat ka sa pag lipat mamaya ha” sabi ko sabay halik sa noo niya. Tumayo mula sa kama niya at lumabas na nang kuwarto.

Di kalayuan ang boarding house nila sa eskwelahan namin kaya nilakad ko nalng ito. Di kalayuan sa eskwelahan may namukhaan ako sa may daanan, pero mas maikli ang buhok niya ngayon, sobrang ikli na hindi ko aakalaing gagawin niya… si SOPHIE.

“Hi!” pagbati ko sa kanya nang nagkalapit na kami. Pero hindi niya ako pinansin at dalidali rin siyang naglakad papalayo.

Late na ako nang maka-uwi sa bahay noong araw na iyon, nagmunimuni ako sa mga narinig ko na nangyari kay Sophie, di ko naman akalain na gagagohin lang pala siya ni Jay nang ganoon. Alam ko dapat kong sabihin na “buti nga sa kanya, niloko din naman niya ako ah” pero bakit parang mas umiiral ang natitira ko pang pagmamahal sa kanya, pero hindi ito pwede, hindi na dapat ako makikipagsapalaran sa mga walang kwentang bagay.

Pumasok ako sa pinto annag bahay namin, hindi ko na binuksan ang ilaw at aakyat n asana nang hagdan nang biglang bumukas ang ilaw, nang napalingon ako nakita ko si papa na nakaupo sa sala.

“Wèishéme xiànzài nǐ zhǐshì? (bakit ngayon ka lang?)”

“Wǒ zhǐshì yǔ péngyǒu wàichū (I was just out with friends)”

“Péngyǒu? Huò nín zhèngzài yùnxíng dì nàgè yúchǔn de xuǎnjǔ? (Friends? Or that stupid election you are running?)”

“Wǒ hái méiyǒu kāishǐ (I haven’t even started with it)”

“Zhè hěn hǎo, yīnwèi nǐ jiāng wúfǎ shǐyòng wǒ de qián, wéi yīxiē yúchǔn de xuǎnjǔ (that’s good, cuz you will not use my money for some stupid election)”

“Shénme? Dànshì, wèishéme bù ne? (What? But why not?)”

“Nǐ yīnggāi xuéxí, jiùshì tā, wǒ méiyǒu wéi nǐ de yúchǔn de wǔdǎo hé bèi dīgū de xuǎnjǔ, nǐ fāsòng nǐ nàgè xuéxiào (You should be studying and that is it, I didn’t send you to that school for your stupid Dance and that underrated election of yours)”

“Xiànzài nǐ yǒu yīgè wèntí yǔ wǒ de wǔdǎo (and now you have a problem with my dancing)” nagalit na ako at lumalakas na ang boses. Nakikita ko na sobrang galit na si papa sa akin, buti nalang at dumating si mama para pigilan kaming dalawa.

“Cóng xiànzài kāishǐ, rúguǒ nǐ réngrán huì tuīdòng, xuǎnjǔ tōngguò, wǒ jiāng zhànshí qiēduàn nín de zhànghù hé xiūjiǎn xiàlái de jīntiē (from now on, if you will still push through with that election, I will temporarily cut your accounts and trim down your allowance.)” his last words before going to his room.

Tears were now filling my eyes and I ran outside of the house and went to that Club that I usually go to para magpakalasing. I just sat in the the bar table and drank till drunk.

It was half past 1 in the morning when “kuya another glass of Bacardy” I said. “Make that two handsome” a familiar voice told the bartender. I looked at the guy blurry and unfamiliar. “Steven? Ikaw ba yan?” I asked.

“Yah it’s me silly, looks like your drunk! What does your sexy ass doing here?” he sat on the empty chair beside me.

“Ayokong umuwi sa amin, nag-away kami ni papa, he always makes me feel vulnerable, ayoko na. Anu nga pala ang ginagawa mo dito? Nasan si Mark?”

“Well he is not here darling lumipat na kasi yung friend niyo, si Enzo, e sasamahan ya daw muna para di ma OP sa mga kasamahan niya sa Boarding house, ewan ko nga ba dun. Mukhang mabigat ang dinadala mo sa ama mo ah” binigay nang bartender ang aming inorder, at kitang kita mo sa mukha ni Steven ang pakikipag flirt niya dito.

“Parati nalang kasi ako, ako na hindi marunong ako na ang walang pakialam sa magiging buhay ko, I was just doing all of this for his sake…”

“What? The Elections? Anu ba talaga ang problema mo?”

“Pera, saan ako kukuha nanag pera para sa lahat nang gastusin eh he will not give me allowance and he even closed my accounts”

“Pera lang ba? Pera lang problema mo? Masusulusyonan ko yan.”

“Talaga? Pahihiramin mo ako?”

“Sure, but I have my conditions… di pwedeng bigay lang nang bigay diba?” ayan na naman yung medyo flirt niyang pananalita.

“What conditions?”

“You will know that later, now lets Drink, Dance and Enjoy” at yun nga sabay na kaming uminom.

Mas lumalim ang gabi at tumama na ang kalasingan ko, umiinit na ang katawan ko at di na ako makakakita nang diretso. Nilabas ako ni Steven sa bar at sinakay sa taxi, di ko na alam kung saan niya ako dadalhin sa mga panahong iyon ang alam ko hindi na ako makabangon sa kalasingan.

The next thing I knew I woke up in a hotel room alone and walang saplot sa katawan, and I was thinking that time on what may have happened the night before when I saw a note on the TV in front of me.

“Thanks I had fun, play mu naman yung CD sa taas nang player- thanks –Steve” yun yung nakalagay sa note. And I played it, at laking gulat ko nang makita ko ang ginagawa ko ang laman nang CD, video anng pinag gagagawa ko the night before, pinasayaw niya ako nang malaswa (galling ko parin sumayaw kahit lasing, isip-isip ko nun) at bigla nalang akong naghubad, striptease at na cut yung video, tapos lumabas si steven sa Vid. “hindi ko naman sinagad ang pagsasamantala kasi hanggang subo lang ang ginawa ko, thanks for the night BTW nandyan ang pera sa side drawer at goodluck na lang sa election” sbi niya sa video na yun. May tiwala ako sa kanya kaya hindi na ako nangamba noong mga panahong yun at umalis na sa hotel at pumunta nanang school para mag finalize nung mga kailangan kung tapusin.

Hindi nagging madali ang election dahil na rin na isa sa mga matagal ko nang kaibigan ang kalaban kong si Andrew, High School palang ay nagging magkaklase na kami pero napilit ko parin siyang kumontra sa akin, oo ako ang pumilit sa kanya dahil mas mapapanatag ako kung hindi man ako ang mananalo dhil siya ang magiging president. Pero di ko sukat akalaing masisira ang pagkakaibigan namin nang dahil kay Jim, kaibigan siya ni Andrew, bakla si Jim pero di kaaya-aya sa inyong paningin.

Sineryoso niya talaga ang election and made situations worst, he started spreading rumors about me and he made me believe that Andrew was the one spreading the rumor and vise versa, sinisiraan ko rin daw si Andrew at pinapalabas ko na bakla siya. Simula noon din a ako kinakausap ni Andrew at dahil kaibigan siya ni Enzo, napaniwala niya din ito na kinakalaban ko ang kaibigan niya.

Dumating si Enzo sa bahay, Wednesday afternoon noon gaya nang ginagawa niya parati. Nang sinalubong ko siya hindi niya ako kinibo. Nang pumasok kami nang kuwarto doon na niya ako kinonfront.

“Talaga bang ganyan ka na ka baba? Para makuha mo ang gusto mo gagawa ka na lang nang kwentong hindi totoo?” paumpisa niya na parang sumisigaw.

“Teka, bakit parang ako ang may kasalanan dito, sila kaya tong naninira sa akin, wala nga akong ginagawa sa kanilang masama at ako pa tong pagbubuntungan mo nang galit?” galit ko ring tugon.

“Sinabihan na kita! Sinabihan na kitang huwag mo nang ituloy to. Dahil masisira lang ang pagsasamahan nating magkakaibigan pero tinuloy mu pa rin, ano klase kang kaibigan”

“Ganoon na lang ba? Mas pipiliin mo pa na kampihan sila kesa sa akin na nobyo mo? Sige ikaw ang bahala, paglabas mo nang bahay ko, isipin mo nalang na wala nang tayo!”

Nagkatinginan lang kaming dalawa, walang imikan, agad din naman siyang umalis nang walang isang salita. Alam ko hindi tama na pagtaasan din siya nang boses, pero lalaki ako, hindi ako marunong umintindi nang madalian, umiiral ang pride bago pa ang lahat.

Hindi ako umiyak di tulad nang dati, pinapasok ko nalang sa kokote ko, panakip butas ko lang siya, panakip butas sa isang relasyong d rin naman nangyari. Nang biglang may tumawag, inuha ko ang cellphone ko, nagmamadli at baka si Enzo yun hihingi nang tawad pero iba ang narinig o sa kabilang linya.

“Hello?” sabi nang lalaki sa kabilang linya.

“hello sino to?”

“Pare ha, matagal lang tayong hindi nagkikita kinakalimutan mo nalang ako”

“Putangina, FELIX!!!! Oh napatawag ka Aya(Kuya)?”

“Im free tonight pwede ka bah? Bonding naman tayo kailangan ko lang nang bestfriend ngayon”

“Sure pare ikaw pa, swerte ko talaga I really need this right now.”

“Sige see you sa bagong Club malapit sa avenue, SoPalace ba name nun?”

“Oo. Alam ko kung saan yun sige kita tayo 8”

Masayang kwentuhan nanaman ang nangyari sa aming dalawa at panay puna namin sa mga babaeng nasa club nang may nakita akong isang pamilyar na mukha sa may bar nang club, nagpaalam ako kay Felix na umalis lang muna para puntahan yung babaeng yun. Kinakabahan akong malaman kung siya nga yun at tama nga ako.

“Sophie?” tanong ko sa babaeng nakaupo na may T-Ice sa kamay, nakita ko nanaman ng napakaamo niyang mukha, the way she looks at me as if I was the last guy on earth and out of the blue she smiled. And I smiled back.

Sophie’s POV

He smiled, oh how I miss seeing those sweet innocent smiles. And everything flashed back in an instant bakit ko ba siya pinakawalan, ako na nga siguro ang pinaka stupid na tao sa buong mundo. At hindi na ako umaasa na may feelings pa siya sakin pagkatapos nang mga nangyari.

“Wow, it’s a coincidence seeing you here…” sabi niya nahiya naman ako.

“Sa kapatid ko yung place at pumupunta ako dito tuwing Wednesday since…” nag aalanganin pa akong pag usapan ang topic pero baka akalain niyang hindi pa ako nakapag move on. “… since the break-up, lam mo naman siguro yun.”

“I’ve heard, wow nice place you have heve at may karaoke stand pa kayo, may kumakanta ba diyan?” at nagtawanan lang kaming dalawa na parang naka bawal na gamot. Namiss ko din na marinig ang tawa niya, at yung mga mata niya parang nakakatunaw parin, di ko akalaing nakatulala nnaaman ako.

“Sophie!” kinuha niya ng attention ko sa pagkakatulala. “Why don’t you join us? Kasama ko best friend ko sigurado ako magkakasundo kayong dalawa” nakakahiya naman na tumangi kaya tumayo narin ako at sumama sa kanya.

“Felix, si Sophie nga pala, yung palagi kong kinikento sayo, sophie si Felix” at biglang tumayo yung lalakeng nakaupo sa may lounge area na kasama ni Caleb.

“NICE to finally meet youy, grabe isang taon nay an ha at di pa kita kilala…” grabe ang tawa niya habang kinakamayan ako. “Akin ka nalang Sophie!” at binatukan siya ni Caleb, “ulol…. Wag ka ngang ganyan pare” sabi pa ni Caleb. Tawa naman nang malakas si Felix, “Sabi ko na nga ba mayt gusto ka pa sa kanya eh” nabigla ako sa sinabi ni Felix at napatingin kay Caleb. Kung d ako nagkakamali namula ang pisnhgi niya, di kasi halata sa madilim na lugar.

Lumalim ang gabi at naging maganda ang takbo nang lahat except kung mahuhuli ko si Caleb na tumitingin sa akin. “Pare kumanta ka naman doon ang sasagwa nang mga kumakanta eh please naman pare!!!” sabi ni Felix habang may hawak na tinidor na tinutok kay Caleb “oh sige na pare” napabuntong hininga si Caleb at mukhang hindi na pipilitan sa kanyang ginagawa.

Nang umupo na siya sa harap at kumuha nang guitara biglang bumilis ang tibok nang puso ko, hindi ko gusto ang nangyayari dahil sa huling beses na narinig ko siyang kumanta nahulog ang puso ko para sa kanya at ngayon ayaw kong mangyari yung muli.

“This song is dedicated to what should have and should be…”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wBtMQ4bt3bI

at pagkatapos nang mga oras na yun naramdaman ko nang tumulo ang luhang namuo sa aking mga mata tumayo ako at tumakbo papalayo, hindi ko na alam kung ano ang gagawin ko oh saan ako pupunta anng mga oras na iyon. At napadpad lang ako sa rooftop nang building na inuupahan nang bar.

Nakatayo lang ako at pinapanood ang mga bituin sa langit. At hindi parin humuhupa ang agos nang mga luha na nang gagaling sa aking mga mata. “Bakit pa ba kita niloko!” napasigaw ako. “Mahal parin kita CALEB TAN” napasigaw ako ulit nang biglng naramdaman kong may biglang yumakap sa akin mula sa likod narinig kong umiiyak din siyang kagaya ko, “I… I’m… so..sorry” utal utal nitong binangit habang nakayakap sa akin. At hinarap ko siya dahil alam kong si Caleb yun.

Nagkatitigan lang kami at sinuol ko siya nang halik bagay na matagal-tagal ko narin gusting maramdaman ang halik nang isang tunay na pag-ibig. At lumiwanag ang paligid dulot nang araw na lumabas mula sa silangan.

-END-
_nang part 1 lang_

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I Don't Wanna Be Your Friend: Stanza 5

Wednesday, May 9, 2012





Pasensya na po sa mga naghihintay nito, sobrang natagalan ang  update, mag-iisang taon na yata. Pasensya na po talaga.

Jhay






________________________________________________________________________

            Nagulat ako nang makilala kung sino ang babaeng bumaba mula sa pulang kotseng dala ni Jason. Hindi ako makapaniwalang nandito ang babaeng yun. Ang babaeng nagnakaw nag una kong halik. Si Michelle. Nang lingunin ko si Matt ay nakita kong sumilay mula sa mga labi nito ang isang malawak na ngiti. Halata sa ekspresyon ng mukha nitong masaya siyang muling nakita ang kanyang nakatatandang kapatid. Hindi ko siya masisisi. It’s been four three years since we last saw her. Ni anino ni Michelle, hindi naming nasilayan. Kaya nga laking gulat nalang namin ang makita ito ngayon. Parang daga lang na pasulpot-sulpot.


            Ngunit lingid sa kaalaman ng barkada ang nangyaring kissing scene sa pagitan namin ng ate ni Matt. It was his birthday party sa bahay nila. I was drunk back then. Nakatulog ako sa sobrang kalasingan at nang magising ako ay nakita kong tulog na rin ang tatlo. Dahil sa pagkauhaw, bumangon ako at kumuha ng tubig sa baba. Alam ko na ang bawat suok ng bahay nina Matt noon pa man. Halos kada sabado ba naman ay doon kami tumatambay mula nang tumuntong kaming ikalawang taon sa kolehiyo eh. Nang makainom ng tubig mula sa dispenser ay nawala ang antok ko kung kaya’t naisipan kong magpahangin muna sa terrace. Hindi ko naman inaasahang nandun rin pala si Michelle.


            “Gising ka pa pala.”, pagtawag ko sa atensyon nito.


            “Gagi! Kakagulat ka ha! Balak mo kong patayin sa sarili kong bahay?!”, eksaherada nitong banat sa akin. Napangiti nalang ako.


            “Eh ikaw, ba’t gising ka pa?”, balik tanong niya sakin.


            “Nagising ako dahil sa uhaw eh. Pag-inom ko ng tubig, ayun nawala ang antok.”, paliwanag ko naman.


            “Ang haba naman ng paliwanag ha.”


            Natahimik ako. Tiningnan ko lang siya.


            “So bakit nga ba gising ka pa?”, pagbasag ko ng katahimikang namuo sa pagitan namin.


            Napabuntong-hininga ito.


            Naghintay akong magsalita ito.


            “Naranasan mo na bang magmahal?”, tanong nito sakin.


            Hindi ako umimik. Ang totoo niyan ay hindi pa ako nagmahal kahit minsan. Wala akong experience kahit sa ligawan man lang.


            “Kasi ako, nagmahal ako ng sobra pero ayun, iniwan pa rin ako. Sumama dun sa babae niyang mukhang paa naman.”, pagpapatuloy nitong hindi na hinitay ang sagot ko.


            Nakita kong tumulo ang mga luha nito sa tulong na rin ng ilaw na nagmumula sa buwan at sa lampshade na nakadikit malapit sa pintuan ng terrace.


            Nilapitan ko ito at niyakap.Napahagulgol ito.


            Hindi ko alam kung ano ang pinagdadaanan nitong sakit pero nakikita ko base na rin sa ekspresyon ng mukha nitong mabigat ang kanyang dinadala. Sa tingin ko nga rin ay wala pa siyang nasasabihan o nakakausap man lang tungkol sa kanyang sitwasyon.


            Hinagod – hagod ko ang kanyang likod at hinayaan lang siyang ilabas ang lahat ng hinanakit na kanyang tinatago maging kay Matt.


            Nang tumigil ito ay napatingin ito sakin.


            “Salamat sa pagdamay ha.”, sabi nitong garagal ang boses.


            Hindi talaga ako sanay na nakikita siyang seryoso at nasasaktan. Sa t’wing magkikita kasi kami nito, puro pambabara lang ang ginagawa sa aming magbabarkada. Taklesa nga eh. Pero nang mga panahong iyon, nakita ko ang pagiging babae niya. Tama, babae lang siya after all.


            Hindi ko namalayan ang unti – unting paglapit ng kanyang mukha sa akin. Nagulat nalang ako nang maramdaman ang paglapat ng aming mga labi.


            The kiss was sweet. Her lips were soft and sweet. It was tempting. Kung kaya naman hindi ko naiwasan ang gumanti ng halik dito. The kiss went deeper at kung wala ako sa tamang katinuan, maaring mas lumalim at maaring iba ang kahantungan nito. She was vulnerable and I’m only a man. Ngunit nang maramdaman kong nagiging mapusok na ito ay agad akong humilawalay at tumigil.


            “Let’s not do this.”, marahan kong sabi sa kanya.


            Nagbalik naman ang malay-tao niya at bigla yatang nahiya sa ginawa.


            “Hey, it’s ok.”, sabi ko. “Let’s just keep this between us. Okay?”


            Tumango ito at pinahid ang luha.


            “S-sige, m-mauna na ako sa’yo.”, sabi nito kapagkuwan.


            Isang batok ang nagpabalik sa’kin sa katinuan.


            “Araykup! Bakit mo naman ako binatukan?”, inis kong tanong kay Matt.


            “Eh kasi po, ka pa nag-iimagine dyan.”, sabi nito. “Tara, salubungin natin ang taklesa.”, pagpapatuloy nito saka binitiwan ang isang mapang-akit na ngiti.


            Naglakad na ito patungo sa pintuan ng resto. Iiling – iling nalang akong sumunod rito.


            “Ate!”, excited na tawag ni Matt kay Michelle sabay yakap rito.


            “Anu ba?! Kararating ko palang papatayin mo na ako sa higpit ng yakap mo sa’kin!”, reklamo nito. Dahilan para bumitaw sa pagkakayakap si Matt rito.


            “Hindi pa rin talaga nagbabago ang tabas ng dila mo no?”, singit ko naman na inirapan lang nito.


            “Antagal mong hindi nagpakita ahh. Saan ka ba nagsususuot at hindi ka naming mahagilap nina Mama.”, si Matt.


            “I’ve been to Korea li’l bro. Nagbakasyon lang.”


            “Bakasyon ba ‘yun eh tatlong taon kang nawala? Saan ka naman kumuha ng panggastos mo dun eh balita ko hindi ka humuhingi kila Mama?”


            “I have my ways.”, sabi nito pagkatapos ay ngumisi.


            “Nakakatakot naman.”, sabad ni Alex.


            “Excuse me, was I talking to you?”, pambabara ni Michelle sabay taas ng kilay nito.


            Nakita naming nalukot ang mukha ni Alex. Dahilan para magkatawanan kami. Sa aming apat kasi, ito ang pinakapikon. Maliban nalang ‘pag kami lang ang nang-aasar. Na-immune na yata sa amin.


            “O siya, siya, can we please take our seats and eat while we catch up, medyo gutom na rin kasi ako eh. This time, it’s my treat.”, si Jason na nakatawa pa rin.


            Bumalik kami sa table na ipinareserve naming. Magakatabi kami ni Matt habang si Jason at Michell naman ang kaharap namin. Si Alex naman ay sinadyang humiwalay kay Michelle at pumuwesto sa kaliwa ni Jason. Tinawag na ni Matt ang waiter at umorder na kaming lima.


            Isang Steak ala Pobre and inorder ni Jason. US Prime Rib naman ang kay Alex, habang si Michelle ay umorder nalang ng Beef Caldereta dahil namiss niya raw ang lutong pinoy. Si Matt naman ay umorder ng Pork Tenderloins habang ako ay Chop Seuy ang inorder

.
            “Gusto niyo po ba ng dessert along sa mga orders niyo Sir?”, tanong ng waiter na kanina pa nakatitig kay Alex.


            “Uhmm, we’ll call you if we decided what to eat for dessert. Refillable Iced Tea nalang rin para sa drinks. Salamat.”, si Alex.


            “Ok sir, iseserve nalang po namin sir. In the meantime, please enjoy our appetizers na ihahatid in a while.”, sabi nito bago umalis.


            “So what’s new?”, tanong ni Michelle habang kumakain kami.


            Napatingin kaming tatlo kay Matt.


            “What? May hindi ba ako alam dito?”, dagdag na tanong nito.


            “I just broke up with Dianne.”, si Matt. Halata pa rin ang sakit sa ekspresyon nito.


            “Oh, why?”, kaswal nitong tugon.


            “She’s pregnant with another man’s child.”


            Natahimik ito.


            “This really is new.”, si Michelle


            “What?”, si Matt


            “Ikaw. Usually nagkakandarapa ka sa pag-iyak pero ngayon, himala, you’re ok. I mean you’re not ok, but at least, you’re not a mess.”


            Sa puntong iyon ay napatingin ako kay Matt. Nakatingin rin pala ang mokong sa akin. Umiwas ako ng tingin at ibinalik ang atensyon sa pagkain.


            “I have my friends with me. Kaya hindi ko na masyadong naisip ang sitwasyon ko. After all, this is a time to be celebrating. We just graduated at handa nang makipagsapalaran sa mundo. I have no more time for drama.”


            Isang makahulugang tango lang ang itinugon ni Michelle.


            “I see. Congratulations nga pala sa inyong apat. Sa wakas. After four years ng pagsusunog ng kilay, eto na kayo. Let’s drink to that.”, sabi nito kapagkuwan.


            Marami pa kaming napag-usapang lima. Napansin kong ibang – iba na talaga si Michelle. She wasn’t the immature girl I met three years ago. May laman na ang mga sinasabi nito. She thinks before she says anything. Although hindi nawala ang pambabara nito, I can tell that something’s changed.


            Natapos ang gabi na naghiwa-hiwalay kami ng daan. Umuwi kami sa kani-kaniyang bahay upang maghanda para sa susunod na araw.


            A trip to Boracay.


            Iyon ang napag-usapan naming mga mababarkada bago pa man kami gumradweyt.
            Pagdating ko ng bahay ay agad akong nag-empake para sa bakasyon. Nang matapos ay nagpunta na rin ako ng kusina para kumain at medyo nagutom ako pagkatapos ng inuman. Gumawa nalang ako ng sandwich dala na rin ng katamarang magluto pa. Habang kumakain ay iginala ko ang mga mata ko sa paligid.


            Malinis pa rin naman ang bahay na pinaghirapan namin ni Inay. Kumpleto na rin ito ngayon sa gamit. Karamihan, galing sa barkada. I smiled.


            Dumako ang paningin ko sa ref. Nakita ko ang litrato ng nanay. May napakagandang ngiti na nakapaskil sa mga labi nito. It was a picture taken from my graduation. Napakasaya ni nanay nang araw na iyon. Hindi ko napigilan ang mga luha ko at tuluyan nang bumagsak.


            Masakit mawalan ng mahal sa buhay. Lalong-lalo na kung galing sa pamilya mo. Naalala ko nang namatay si inay, halos sisihin ko ang Diyos sa lahat ng nangyaring kamalasan sa buhay ko. Ngunit napagtanto kong siya rin naman ang dahilan sa lahat ng tagumpay na natamo ko. May plano ang Diyos para sa ating lahat, yan ang laging sabi ni nanay.


            Hindi ko na naubos ang sandwich. Pinunasan ko nalang ang mga luha ko at tinungo ang kwarto ko. Hindi rin nagtagal ay nakatulog ako.



Nagising ako sa tunog ng cellphone ko. It was a call from Jason.



            “H-hello?”


            “Anong hello? Anong oras na Bryan Roy! Male-late na tayo sa flight natin at hindi ka pa bumabangon dyan?!


            “Masyado ka namang excited, ala-tres pa ng hapon ang flight natin. Ang aga-aga eh.”


            “If you hadn’t noticed, it’s already 12 noon.


            “Holy! Sige na maliligo na ako. See you in 30 minutes.”


            Hindi ko akalaing tatanghaliin ako ng gising. Mukhang napasarap ang tulog ko ah. Dala na siguro ng inumin. Dali-dali akong naligo at nagbihis para makarating sa pad ni Jason. Pagdating ko ay nakita kong handa na silang tatlo.


            “Pasensya na kayo, medyo napasarap ang tulog ko eh.”, paghingi ko ng paumanhin.


            “Hindi nga? Hindi halata ha.”, pang-aasar naman ni Andrew na tinawanan naman ni Matt at Jason.


            “Ano pa nga bang aasahan namin sa’yo? Eh lagi namang ikaw ang nahuhuli sa mga lakad natin.”, si Jason. At sabay pang nagtawanan ang tatlo.


            “O, tama na yan, iiyak na yang si Bryan o, napapakamot na ng ulo eh.”, si Matt.


            At talagang dumagdag pa ang isang ‘to. Makikita nyo, makakabawi rin ako.

            

           Walang hassle mula nang dumating kami sa airport hanggang makarating kami sa isla ng Boracay. The rumors were true. The island was indeed breathtaking.


            “Wow, pare, hanep talaga ang Boracay. Ang ganda.”, si Andrew.



            “I agree. Pero ang sabi, mas maganda raw dito noon, nang wala pang masyadong mga establishments.”, si Jason.



            Tahimik lang akong iginala ang paningin ko sa paligid. Nagpahatid kami sa tricycle papuntang resort na pina-book ni Andrew. Maganda ang kwartong napili ni Andrew. It was an African Safari themed room kung saan makikita mo ang dagat mula roon.


            It was really nice. Itwas around 4:30 in the afternoon when we arrived at medyo nakaramdam kami ng gutom kung kaya nagkayayaan kaming kumain na muna sa labas sabay gala na rin sa isla.


            Masaya kaming nagtatawanan sa daanan habang naghahanap ng makakainan. Parang walang mga problema. Kahit na si Matt mismo, masiglang masigla at halatang excited makapag-ikot ikot.


            Nakakita kami ng isang restaurant sa tabi ng dagat at mukhang masarap naman ang mga isine-serve nila kung kaya nagdesisyon kaming doon nalang kumain.


            Nagtatawanan pa rin kami habang nasa lamesa nang may tumama sa ulo ko.


            “Hey, I’m so sorry about that, my fault.”, sabi ng isang tinig na nagmula sa likuran ko.


            Nilingon ko ang pinanggalingan ng boses. I was stunned. He was gorgeous. Maputi, maganda ang hubog ng katawan, he had a nice smile, his eyebrows complimented his brown eyes. He was as breathtaking as the sunset.


            “Are you okay?”, tanong ulit nito.


            “I-I’m sorry?”, nasabi ko na tila wala sa tamang katinuan. Na ikinatawa naman nito. Even his laughed sounded nice. Anghel kaya ito na nagbalat-kayo lang?


            “Uhm, I said, are you okay? Natamaan ka kasi ng volleyball kanina nung nagspike ako.”, sabi nito.
            “Ahh, yeah, I’m okay.”, sabi ko na tila nahiya.


            “Good to hear that.”, sabi nito saka ngumiti, “I better get going,if you wanna join us for a friendly game, don’t hesitate to come okay? I’m Seth by the way.”


            Nilahad nito ang palad na tinanggap ko rin naman,


            Hindi ko alam kung ano ang naramdaman ko nang tanggapin ko ang kamay niya. It was as if every nerve in my body was alive. And then it hit me like the volleyball in my head.


            “I’m actually attracted to this person?!



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