Like Dandelion Puff

Monday, April 4, 2011

“Mom, Ron is puttin’ the spider on my bed”, Robi’s squeal reached my ear in the kitchen. I’m washing the plates we used for dinner. This is a routine every night. Robi and Ron’s spatting was a routine, too.
I left the dishes on the sink and went upstairs to their bedroom. Ron is already ten, but he loves mocking his five year old brother, Robi. One time he painted Robi’s face green, locked him inside the bathroom, and he sometimes pulled down Robi’s pants. But if Robi’s gone to Mom’s house for a couple of days, Ron always asks me to bring him home. Ron misses his brother when gone, but bullies him when present. But I know he loves his brother very much.
The door of their bedroom was half-opened and I could see Robi sitting on the floor with his legs crossed, and crying. I slid the door open and when he noticed me, he got to his feet and ran towards me. On the opposite side, Ron was pretending to be asleep, facing the wall while silently laughing.
“Mom, Ron won’t take away that spider on my bed”, he said while pointing the toy spider, tarantula, on his bed.
“That was just a toy, sweetie”, I said while walking towards his bed, with him following and hiding behind me.
“But it scares me mommy. It gives me the creeps”, he said, pulling his eyebrows together which gave him the appearance of a very sad little angel. I sat on his bed with him on my lap. I took the spider which made him wail, “Mom, don’t do that!”
“It was just a toy. Now come, touch it.” He wrapped his arms on my neck and sank his face on my chest. “Come on. Don’t be afraid. You’re a brave young man, aren’t you?”

He raised his head and looked at me, and I know he’d try. He turned to the toy spider resting on my palm. He slowly raised his hand to touch the spider, but Ron shouted, “Don’t touch it Rob, it bites!” he is grinning.
“See, mom? It bites”, Robi withdrawed his hand and wrapped it back around my neck. I looked at Ron who was still grinning. I gave him the look and said, “If you wouldn’t stop, Ron, I’m gonna let you sleep outside. You sure would not like it, would you?” he rolled his eyes and lied back. “Now come on sweetie, touch it. It didn’t bite. Don’t believe in him. He’s a coward. You’re not a coward, are you?”
He shakes his head. He slowly rose his hand again which was shaking, until it finally touched the toy spider. The moment he touched it, he smiled, making his two dimples appear. He took it away from my palm and held it on his hand. He laughed at himself.
“See? It didn’t bite you.”
“Did it bite you, Rob?” Ron is grinning again. Robi stucked out his tongue to his brother.
He crawled to his bed and lied. I threw his Mickey Mouse comforter over his body. “Mom, could you tell me a story? Just until I sleep.”
“Sure sweetie. What do you want?” I asked even though I know what would be his answer.
“The Little Panda!” he said excitedly.
He already heard this story a hundred times. I could tell it was his favorite. I started telling him the story. “Once there was a little panda named Ollie who was lost in the jungle…” He is listening attentively, smiling at every funny and happy scene.
Before I could even finish the story, he was already asleep. “…And little Ollie, together with his family, lived in the jungle happily ever after.” His face was very calm, like a little angel sleeping on the cloud.
I slowly move to avoid waking him. When I stood up, I leaned to kiss his forehead. “Goodnight sweetie”, I whispered.
I walked towards Ron who was snoring. I kissed his forehead also and whispered, “Goodnight, Ronnykins!” I used to call him Ronnykins and he always scowls at me. He didn’t like because he said he was already a big man. But they will always be my babies.
I turned out the light and closed the door behind me. I went downstairs and decided to finish my work. I peered into the sala to check my husband, Kevin.
He was already asleep in the couch with the remote control still in his grip. I took it out and turned-off the television. I squeezed him and whispered, “Hey, dad, go upstairs now. Don’t sleep here.”
He opened his eyes slowly and rubbed it. He shaked his head and said, “Oh! I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay, dad.”
He stood and kissed me, “Night, hon. Aren’t you sleepy yet?”
“I still have to finish washing the plates. I’ll just follow you upstairs when I’m done, ‘kay?”
“Okay.Night” he leaned amd kissed me again.
“Goodnight!” I replied.
He went upstairs and I to the kitchen, resuming myself in washing the plates. I hummed to myself to eliminate boredom.
When I’m done, I immediately went upstairs. I took a shower to relieve the day’s stress. I changed into my night gown and lay beside Kevin. He woke up and pulled me to lay my head on his arm. “I love you, Sabine”, he whispered. I could feel his breath on my ear and neck which sent tingles to my body.
“I love you, too. And I always will be loving you”, I replied. He kissed me and I embraced him. I sank my face to his chest, smelling his citrusy scent.
Then we slept.
§ § §
“I’m done, mom”, Robi said as he finished eating his bread, hotdogs and eggs. I gave him a glass of water and he drank it all. “Hey, Ron, I finished first”.
“Nope. I’m first.”
“Yours were still half-eaten.”
“‘Coz I’m not hungry. But i finished first.”
“Enough kids.” Kevin interrupted their spatting moment and they behaved themselves. Ron stood up and grabbed his backpack on the couch, and so Robi.
“Are you done, dad? I’m already late.” Ron said even if it was still one hour earlier his class.
“Yep. Now off you go and get my briefcase. Fast.” Kevin commanded and Ron went away, half-running to get his briefcase.
Every weekday, Kevin drives Ron to school because it was just on his way home. And I drove Robi to his kindergarten before going to work.
Ron was already sitting in the front seat of his dad’s car after kissing on my cheek. He is waving through the window.
“Bye hon”, Kevin said and kissed me. “And you li’l buddy. Make sure to behave yourself at school.” He bent down to kiss Robi, and then went to his car.
The moment the engine roared into life, Robi ran out and waved at them.
“Bye, daddy. Bye, ron. Bye. Goodbye! Goodbye, dad. Goodbye, Ron. Goodbye. Bye bye!” Robi said.
“Hey sweetie! They will still come back”, I said and he turned and smiled at me. “Get inside my car.” I said. Kevin’s car drove away.
I locked the door of the house and get inside my car after. The moment I shut the door, I turned to Robi and said, “Put you seatbelt on, sweetie”, and he followed.
I put the key into the ignition and bring my engine to life. We then drove away.
I drove at an above-average rate because I’m running out of time. It rained and the road became slippery. The trees that stood side-by-side in the road was glistened with the raindrops.
I turned to Robi who was enjoying himself singing Old McDonald while jiggling his legs.
When I looked back into the road, I was surprised when a deer was standing at the center. I rolled the steering wheel to avoid the deer. I heard our tires screech which hurts me ear. Robi yelled, “Mom!” Our car was turning into circles in the middle of the road and turned upside down before crashing to a tree.
My body hurts like all of my bones cracked. I can’t move. I can’t talk. My heart beats at a very high rate, like it’ll going to get out of my chest. My body was splattered with blood.
I looked at Robi. His head was covered with blood. He’s unconscious. Oh God! Please help us. Please help my son. I prayed mentally, and then I’m unconscious.
§ § §
I woke up in the hospital. I was lying on the bed. My body doesn’t hurt anymore. The pain was gone. I’m feeling light. I searched for somebody but no one was here except me.
I got up to my feet and went out of the room. Outside, I saw Kevin sitting on a queue of white chairs, facing the emergency room. Then I remembered Robi. My heart began to beat fastly, and my tears started to fall again.
I walked towards Kevin as fast as I could manage. “Hon, how’s Robi?” I asked but he didn’t answer me. He just sat there, staring at the floor. His face gleamed with tears. I know deep in my heart that he blamed me for what had happened.
Yes, I must be blamed. It was my entire fault. This will not going to happen if I just only focused on the road. If only I drove at an average speed.
The memories kept on flashing to me, like clips from a movie. The deer. Robi’s yell. Robi’s face covered with blood. I couldn’t put into words to explain what I felt inside. It hurts. It really hurts. I cried. Crying was all I could do.
Robi! Please God. Help my son. Holy Mary and all the blessed Saints in heaven, help my son.
Then the doctor went out of the ER. I stood up, and Kevin, too.
“Doc, how’s our boy?” I asked. Hoping to hear him say Robi’s okay. He didn’t meet my gaze, and I know there was something wrong.
He turned to mu husband and said; “We did all we can. I’m sorry.”
I felt my heart was breaking, in agony. His words will going to change my life forever. My Robi. He’s gone. Tears were streaming down to my cheeks and I know it will never stop.
Kevin walked and entered the room. I followed him behind. There on the bed, unconscious and lifeless, lied…my body? I moved for a closer look. It was really I. how could that be?
Then realization came into me. It’s I who died. I embraced Kevin who was embracing my body also, crying. “I love you honey. I will love you until eternity.”
But where’s Robi?
I went out. My heart and mind seemed to know where he is. They led me to the room where I came out awhile ago. There on the lied Robi, sleeping. I’m so glad he got a little damage only. Beside him was Ron, sleeping, holding Robi’s hand.
I leaned to Robi and kiss his forehead. “I love you, sweetie”. Then he smiled, showing his dimples. I hugged Ron and whispered, “Take care of you little brother Ronnykins. Mommy loves you very much.” Then he raised his head and whispered, “Mom?” as if he can see me.
I know I have to leave now. I hate the thought of it, but leaving is inevitable. I will never coming back again no matter how badly I wanted to. My body, or I should say my soul, felt light. It seems like I’m floating in the air. My tears began to flow but I struggled to smile, to feel happy that my Robi was okay. But smiling wasn’t easy anymore, for when I follow to where the wind would bring me, there is no coming back to the place where I wanted to be. Like dandelion dust.
The End!!!

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